Defeating the Scale Tuesday – Week 4 – Gain

when did pinterest become an ad site for weight loss programs?? theres loads on here today. Go away and make room for cake recipes!!!

  • Starting Weight: 190.8 pounds
  • Current Weight: 191.4
  • Week Difference: +0.6
  • Total Difference: +0.4
  • Emotion: Wrong Direction

Well, I knew I wasn’t perfect this week, but I honestly thought I would lose weight because I had a good amount of days that were on par.  I realize now, I need to have multiple – all – days on par.  These are lessons and realizations that we could argue, I already knew, but at the same time, while I thought I knew them, apparently I didn’t know their value.

I am fighting against the system of what I can and can’t eat.  There are things, I will not be able to have in the house – ice cream, cereal, crackers, 100 calorie packs, etc – which this week I did a great job of not getting.

But one day doesn’t make it all better, it’s just a start.

Day 2 of Awesome

  • B: 3 eggs, scrambled; coffee & half and half
  • S: Orange
  • L: Turkey Wrap with Munster, lettuce, onion, mustard; apple
  • S: Yogurt and a banana
  • D: Taco Tuesday

Activity:  My glute muscle on my left side (the side of my body who just plain hates me forever) is strained (at least my non-medical background opinion thinks so) so I am thinking that I won’t run today but I’ll do a workout DVD – I might do the Kickbox Fast fix from Jillian Michaels.  Three twenty minute workouts – Legs, upper body, core.  So I might do all three.. full body workout!

Onward my friends!

I Need Someone Else to Make My Choices

Shall we start with Friday?

Jason had to work late because there are certain contractor companies that apparently suck at doing their own jobs.  So he didn’t get home till about 11:20 pm.  So what did I do?


Yup.  I drank.  Actually a whole bottle of wine to myself.  I then proceeded to open another, but apparently it had turned.  It had turned real bad.  But I had already had a full bottle of wine to myself so how was I supposed to know?  Before the drunkardness set in I went out and picked up Pizza for us and then put it in the oven on warm.  I settled in and started watching “The House At The End Of The Street” starring my BFF Jennifer Lawrence.

She, of course, was awesome – although the movie was kind of dumb until the end.  The end was NOT what I thought was going to happen.  So if you have Netflix – it’s playing on online streaming.  I found it very interesting.

I then started to watch the Human Centipede – which is not scary at all.  Really hilarious actually, and so poorly done.  Not remotely scared, nor have I lost sleep. But that night, Jason came home and did not have any desire to watch it.

I woke up on Saturday morning with a wine headache, and then vowed that I would not do that again, and I also wasn’t going to exercise either.  I had done my long run the day before, so I figured I should let myself rest.  Plus I was totally going to run on Sunday.

Saturday was kind of a blur, we did some stuff?  I think? Dogs got groomed, we grabbed lunch and coffee, and then hung out at home until it was time to go meet our friends for dinner.  We decided to stop off at Heritage Brewing Company and have a couple of drinks.  After two beers each we set off to dinner, where I had horrible thai food and 2 more beers.  Then after that we went to BadWolf Brewing Company where I had 3.5 more beers and wasn’t feeling any pain.  After hanging out with the owners and such for hours talking about the whole gambit of beer and fun and beer.

THEN you would think I would be all like “Let’s go home” but no.  Then we went to Monza in old town Manassas and I got two more beers.  Because apparently I don’t want to keep my liver.  Needless to say, I woke up feeling HORRIBLE on Sunday.


So Jason came to my rescue and made our first Chemex coffee.  It really did make things a lot better, and I really like using it.  I didn’t think I would, but man that coffee tastes so good this way.  It really helped.  After breakfast we decided to head out and do some stuff – more coffee, shopping at Old Navy, getting gas for Jason’s car.


When I realized I had no make up on and felt like I was a corpse.  It didn’t help that I was still hungover, most likely since Friday and we were going to meet my parents at a winery.  Because what else do you do.

We stopped at Rite Aid where I purchased cheap make up that will now live in my purse to stop this from happening again.

So I did a wine tasting at Barrel Oak Winery and then we went to Delaplane Cellars, where we did another wine tasting and then between the 4 of us we had 3 bottles of wine.  I was not feeling anything but grapes at this point.

So what does one do when overly emotional and drunk?  GROCERY SHOP.

I’m shocked I got everything on the list.  SHOCKED.  I don’t remember certain part of it.  Like getting eggs, or beer.  Yes we got more alcohol.  I also don’t remember picking out deli meat.  I don’t remember the drive home.

I remember when we got home and fed the dogs I cooked dinner and made lunches for Monday.

After that I am a bit blurry.  I know I didn’t sleep well, and I know it’s the alcohol and then stress, and the fact I haven’t exercised since Friday.

Today’s Plan:

  • Live through work
  • B – Eggs, bacon, coffee
  • S – Orange, water
  • L – Wrap with turkey, cheese, bell pepper; yogurt, baby carrots
  • S – Apple, quest bar
  • D – Greek Salad
  • Run 4 miles

Biggest Loser Boot Camp DVD (I heart you Bob Harper)

I didn’t want to run last night, and the idea of just strength training from a book made me bored, so I looked through my stack of Workout DVDs.  Not wanting to be yelled at (Ahem, Jillian), I opted for the Biggest Loser Boot Camp DVD with Bob Harper.  I really enjoy these DVDs because they have people who haven’t completed their weight loss journeys, and also have people who are maintaining.  It’s more realistic and less intimidating.

There are 3 workouts (20, 15, and 10 minutes in length) plus a 5 minute warm up and cool down.  I opted for the 20 minute and 15 minute workout with the warm up and cool down to give myself a 45 minute workout.  I had never actually used this DVD (weird) so I wasn’t sure what to expect.

You do everything in this workout and you are screaming at the end.

I had to stop a lot during the second workout, my arms were screaming and I was only using 8 pound weights.  This DVD made me feel WEAK.  Which is good.  It has some cardio intervals, but the emphasis is on body weight and strength strength training.  I really enjoyed it, and am looking forward to doing it again.  I plan on this being my workout twice a week along with running 3 times a week.


  • Breakfast – 2 eggs, bacon, coffee, and half and half (6p+)
  • Snack – Orange (0p+)
  • Lunch – Flatout wrap, turkey, provolone, mustard and onion (7p+), yogurt (3p+), Carrots (0p+), Diced Pears in juice (2p+)
  • Snack – Before Class Banana and apple (0p+), during class Coffee (3P+) and Quest Bar (5P+)
  • Dinner – Black Bean Avocado Salad (Black beans, avocado, cherry tomatoes, onion, bell pepper, lime juice, cilantro, corn, romaine lettuce) (7p+)

No activity today because I have class this evening.  I can’t believe after this week, I’ll have 5 weeks left in the semester.  Lordy lou.  It went by quick!

I’m also looking forward to not taking classes this summer.  I am, however, trying to figure out how I can go about getting some certificates with regards to my Masters.  I know Jason is reading this watching his money fly away thinking of it… Especially since I am looking at PhD programs too….. Sorry hunny!

I hope you all have a blessed day!  I’m gearing up for races in April, and scared to death about running another half marathon so close to the one I just did.  I guess that’s good for marathon training right?


Defeating the Scale Tuesday – Week 3 – Standstill

I already knew this secret.  Someday, I am going to try it,  I swear I am.  Just as soon as I finish pinning 100 more fabulous desserts!!!!!!

  • Starting Weight: 190.8 pounds
  • Current Weight: 190.6
  • Week Difference: 0
  • Total Difference: -0.2
  • Emotion: Motivation?

I was surprised that I didn’t gain this week, but also, as usual I was upset that I didn’t lose either.  I do realize that a lot of my weight at this point isn’t just fat, but muscle.  My calves are pretty tight and hard and so are my hamstrings.  I guess if I didn’t feel like an Ox barreling down the hallway when I walk at work, the number on the scale wouldn’t matter so much.

Buy, hey look, it does.

I ran my 7 miles yesterday which was painful and horrible and I hate treadmills.  I think I am developing a hate of running because of treadmills.  I don’t hate it when I am outside or when I am in a race (except for the last mile) so it has to be the treadmill.  I feel weak on it.  My legs and shins start to scream on it.  I think I have found the solution to my own problem.

Today I didn’t really have a workout planned so much as I was going to see how I felt at the end of the day and go from there.  I think I might do some HIIT and arm exercises but without a plan in front of me I look dumb just going through random exercises.  Ugh.

Maybe I’ll do a workout from Drop 2 Sizes and then sprints on the treadmill.  hmmm.

Food Today:

  • B – 2 eggs, 3 strips of bacon, coffee & fat free half and half (6p+)
  • Snack – Orange (0p+)
  • Lunch – Chipotle Salad – Lettuce, Brown Rice, Pinto Beans, Veggies, medium salsa (5p+)
  • Snack – Apple, Banana (0p+) or Quest Nutrition Bar (5p+)
  • Dinner – Gluten free pasta, Ground beef, pasta sauce (12p+)

weight loss motivation | Weight Loss Motivation (Part2) | waysforweightloss

Get Burning

I was a bit down this weekend.  We had planned to go to the shelter to meet a dog that would possibly become our new family member.  I was excited allllll week.  Thursday, though, we brought Moody in because of his legs shaking and his loss of weight.  Turns out our poor boy has been in extreme pain for a while.  They ran a full blood panel, which luckily came back great, and then they did X-Rays and found the problem.  His spine is being pushed by slip disc’s, and fusion of vertebra.  His bones are fusing together which causes hooks from where the discs slipped.  It goes down his entire back.  I bit the inside of my mouth so that I wouldn’t lose it in the room.

They sent us home with pain meds, muscle relaxers, and nerve pain meds.  So he will most likely be on those for the rest of his life.  Which I hope, beyond hope, that it will be a longer one.  Our old man is old, and fragile.

So we still went to the shelter thinking that it could still work out with this new guy, but sadly, it wouldn’t.  He was amazing.  He was a big black fury lab mix, who was high strung.  I didn’t care.  I got on the floor with him and he loved Jason and everything seemed perfect.

Except, he was huge.  He was high strung.  He was intimidating.  If we didn’t have other dogs, it would have been no issue.  If the shelter had said he was great with other dogs it would have been no issue.  But he was finicky with new dogs, and we feared he might – unintentionally – hurt Moody because of his size.  Moody is only 12.5 pounds.  This dog was 90 pounds.   We left, with heavy hearts, because I can’t say no to puppies.  I cried at times, but somewhere deep down it didn’t feel right.

Moody needs our attention now.

So after lunch and some errands we went home and I decided to run.  I did 4 miles and felt better, with full intention of doing the long run on Sunday.

That didn’t happen either.

I was lazy, tired, and not having it.  It didn’t help that the night before I decided to drink – but not get drunk – but still drink.  I woke up feeling dehydrated and sore.  Go Beth.

I will run my 7 miles today and be done with it.

Is it Friday Yet?

Scene from the coffee shop Sunday Afternoon

Girl Friday

We’ve made it!  It’s Friday!  Hallelujah!

On Wednesday when I came home, the idea of running on the treadmill hurt my soul, and since the snow was still out in full force on the sidewalks, I was like “Psssh, I’ll skip my workout”.  Jason was like “Don’t run, but don’t skip it either.”  So I pulled out an oldie but a goodie workout DVD a la Jillian Michaels.

I forgot how much I hate her.

I did level 1 because let’s face it, I haven’t done strength, HIIT, anything other than running, in a while.  Boy, did it show.

I found the workout on YouTube (most likely illegal, but whatever) in case you want to try the workout before committing to the $9.99 DVD.  Needless to say, even though I only burned about 200 calories according to my HRM, I was dead at the end.  My body was screaming, I was dripping with sweat, ugh.  I know calorie burn is not the end all be all of how hard you worked in your workout, but I was a bit miffed.  I thought I had kicked ass.

Then I woke up Thursday morning.

So those are glute muscles and hamstrings.  So those are the obliques.  Hah.  Ouch.

Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness (or DOMS) is what I experienced.  Walking across campus was hard, sitting down on the toilet was excruciating, picking up the dogs water bowl was impossible.  I guess I did kick ass.

So I woke up this morning with what felt like even worse pain, but of course it hurts more.  I’ve been laying down in a comfortable position all night and my muscles are stiff.  I’m sure by this afternoon I’ll be good to go.

Today’s Plan!

  • Breakfast: 2 eggs, 3 strips of bacon, coffee & fat free Half and half (6P+)
  • Snack: Banana (0P+)
  • Lunch: Gluten free wrap, turkey, provolone, bell pepper, onion and mustard (7P+), Pretzels (3P+), Yogurt (3P+)
  • Snack: Apple, Diet coke (0P+)
  • Dinner: TBD.  I am supposed to make homemade pizza, but I’m like ‘eh’.  We’ll see.  May be I will make it.  May be we’ll go out.  Who knows.

Activity: 4 Miles running – I’m doing this on the treadmill, because I really need to get used to intervals again.  The marathon I’m doing in the fall will be intervals, so I should get used to that now.  I’ve been floundering on those because I’m dumb and somehow decided that I could just run the whole half marathon, and I got burned out at mile 7.

Back to the drawing board.  Hopefully adding the strength in as well will build up those muscles too.

  1. What are you doing this weekend?
  2. What is your next race?
  3. Cook dinner on Friday nights or eat out?

I Do Not Believe In The Wall

If you read the Oatmeal, you get the title.  If not, go here now.  The way I feel about running, and the effects of it, have been captured in a funny comic that makes it easy to digest for people who constantly ask “Why do you run all those miles?” or state “You are insane”.

Before I didn’t have answer for them, or a comeback.

I ran 4 slow miles yesterday, which was what I mentally needed.  I mentally need to go slower because if I get used to that when training, if I happen to run slower during a race, it won’t damage me (I will admit I went into a lull after Saturday’s half because I didn’t PR, and I actually ran the worst time I ever have for a half marathon.).  Running is supposed to be fun, it’s not like I am competing with anyone but myself.

So the 4 miles on the treadmill was in 43’13″ or a 10’48″ average pace.  To be fair I was doing intervals, and jumping off the treadmill when I needed to.  My legs felt wonky and my mind wasn’t there, but I still pushed through.  After I hit mile 3 I just thought, you know, I can do one more.  Part of me even wanted to go farther, but it was getting to the point of where I needed to do a lot of stuff around the house so I stopped.

Tonight I plan on another 3-4 miles on the treadmill.  I hope that by Saturday – my long run day – the majority of the sidewalks are clear so I can go outside and get back to doing that on a regular basis.  I have 3 more races till I break for the summer, and then pick up in September with the Navy/Air Force Half Marathon.  There is also a 5 miler option, and registration is open now.

It’s awesome because it fits right into my training for the Marathon.  I have to run 13 miles that weekend anyways, so why not get a medal for it?  Am I Right?

After looking at the course map I am a bit afraid that the stupid insane hill from the Rock N’Roll race is in there too around mile 9.  Damn.


Defeating the Scale Tuesday – Week 2

  • Starting Weight: 190.8 pounds
  • Current Weight: 190.6
  • Week Difference: +1.8
  • Total Difference: -0.2
  • Emotion: Beh.

I’m chalking this up to eating whatever I wanted after the race on Saturday.  I literally did not leave anything on my plates for the rest of the weekend.  I drank a lot of sangria, a lot of wine, and ate so much bread (Yeah, I’m totally Gluten Free.. buh).  I knew it was going to be bad, but at the same time it’s not as bad as it could have been.

Acceptance is the new goal of this week.  I am posting pictures of myself saying how bad I look, and I get nothing but “What is wrong with you?” comments back.  So instead of being all mad that they can’t see what I see (i.e. failure) I’m going to try and see things through their eyes.

I have nice hair – when I attempt to do something with it.  Whether it’s curly or straight I can pretty much make myself look human without much effort.

I can do my own makeup with ease.  I don’t have the steadiest of hands, but I can apply eyeliner in about 15 seconds per eye, and I don’t mess up often.

I love my freckles.

When I try, I can put outfits together easily.  I have a lot of basics and though I go through the ‘I don’t have anything to wear” moments like all women do, I can find something.

I’m not as fat as I think I am.

I have great shoes.

I really enjoy running.

I have a pretty good sense of humor – at least when I make the jokes at my own expense.

I have an unhealthy obsession with Kate Middleton, Baking, and Salads.  I see these as positives, because a.) she’s a great role model, b.) baking is a fun and calming activity, c.) Salads are healthy.

I am rarely, if ever, boring.

I might stumble, fall, drink too much, swear like a sailor, eat like a hippo, and have my dark moments where I just want to hide in a nest of blankets that smell like my dogs, and not shower for days on end and then eat hummus with a spoon – but I always wake up the next day.

I might take things that are most important to me for granted, and not see the blessings I have on a daily basis, but when I do see them, I am overwhelmed and humbled.

I have the best guy in the world in my corner.

I’m accepting, one moment at a time, and it will get easier.  It does get better.  I will have these things for me.  I will find that moment.  I need to be happy with myself now, and stop the cycle.


Why I Am Resting Today

Why I Am Resting Today

This is pre-race yesterday. The active photos during the race are horrid, and frankly I am now more determined than ever to follow the plan and get healthy, because I’m tired of looking this way, and feeling this way.

I’m resting today, because I just shoveled snow, and my legs and back are still screaming. I’ll jump back in the saddle tomorrow. My weigh in won’t be pretty, but they never are, are they?


I Got a PW at my Race; Working at Home; Need to get My Ish Together

I got a PW (Personal worst) at my race on Saturday

I was not really prepared going into this race.  I knew that the night before.  I was also not feeling mentally okay the night before or the morning of.  I was nervous about this race, and it wasn’t until I actually started running that I felt good.  I felt great walking through the water stops, and then running while pacing myself through the first 5.5 miles.  Then the bitch of a hill showed up.

Calvert St. leaving Rock Creek Park.


My legs felt shredded and like lead after 9 miles.  BUT they did tick away pretty quickly.  I was kind of shocked how the mile markers never felt too far apart.  I felt strong during it, but my endurance seemed to pretty much suck.  I think that is mainly because of my lack of outdoor runs.  I need and will get back outside this weekend…

Working From Home

…If the snow melts.  Yes.  WE GOT MORE SNOW.  I’m so sick of this.  SO SICK OF THIS.  I’m just happy I have the ability to work from home, so I don’t have to take vacation.  Plus if there was ever a Monday where I needed to take the day off, it would have been today.  My legs still feel pretty shredded from the race, so I plan on doing an easy run later and some strength training.  I need to build up glute and hamstring strength – that is the only way that I am going to get better and faster.  I’d like to build up that strength before the massive training begins with the Marathon and all.  So I’m listening this time, and doing strength training as well as cross training that is not slow running.

Need to Get My Ish Together

I’m the Queen of excuses.  I’m the Queen of tomorrows.  I’m the Queen of “I’ve already screwed up”.  Now I am taking on the title of Queen of One day at a time.  I’m taking everything one step at a time, and going from there.  I’ve pre-tracked today and I hope that helps me stick to things.

I need to stop acting like what I have done up to this point is what I can continue to do and get the results I want.  I have to change to get change.  I have to make the choices that need to happen to evoke the change I want.  I have to decide that this is what I want and then go for it.

Today: 2-3 miles easy run, strength training (lower body)

Let’s do this.