Category Archives: Feeling Good

Calorie Burn and How It Owns Me

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I came home, did my strength training workout along with my HIIT, and was disappointed in the calorie expenditure my HRM relayed back.

40 minutes of busting my ass for 314 calories?

I was actually mad that my body was becoming more efficient.

So now I know it’s time to up the intensity. Higher weights, higher speed intervals. My thighs are burning just thinking about it. I can’t wait for the day when I can just do my workouts and not worry about how many calories I’ve burned. When I find that sweet spot if eating and working out that helps me maintain it all.

Am I dreaming? It can’t be. There are people who live that way.

I feel good about my choices today and satisfied with rejoining Weight Watchers. I’m not expecting a loss anytime soon, but I’m happy that the structure is back.

How was your Monday?

Monday Moments

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  • First and foremost!  MY LITTLE SISTER IS ENGAGED!

Ahh I feel old.  Craziness!  Happy for both of them!  I’m mostly excited because it meant I could make a Pinterest Board – Wedding Board for Cece! - and start pinning things.  I am sure she won’t use any of my ideas, but I love weddings, and I like to plan fake ones in my spare time.  Congrats again to you both!

  • I skipped The Color Run yesterday.  My left eye was swollen shut, and I felt like death.  The Husband let me sleep in till about 9:30 and then we made our way to brunch where I properly stuffed my face.  I still feel sick from that meal, but hey, I was sick so my body wanted what it wanted.  I still managed to accomplish 3.25 miles on the treadmill yesterday (HIIT and some walking for the mileage) so all was not lost.  I am feeling much better today, and have doped myself up on all the allergy medication I could find.
  • I’m so far loving being back on Weight Watchers.  I’ve planned out my meals for the week, it helped that we went grocery shopping last night, and I’ve already made lunches too!  I’m still having the wave of doubt that this will work this time, but The Husband has faith.  He even said “I think you’ve learned a lot now.  I think this will be the time you can make it happen.”  It helps with that kind of support.  It also helps that I am routinely now making meals that are low on the Glycemic Index just from habit.  I know Carbs – Breads mostly – are a trigger, so I tend to not include them.  I also know that I can have a treat once in a while, but with all the veggies I’m piling on my meals, I’m not hungry.
  • I said it.  I am not hungry.
  • My arms are looking more and more tone.  Don’t get me wrong, there is still a nice layer of flab, and a wing that waves whenever I do jazz hands, but it’s a process, right?  I’ll get there.  Right now I am just enjoying my new love of HIIT running.  I don’t cover a lot of miles, but I noticed on my normal run on Saturday I was able to keep running at a constant pace longer, than before.
  • I start classes again in 2 weeks.  Wahhhhhhh.
  • Today’s Workout:
    • NROLFW Stage 3 B2 & 15 minute Intervals (1 Min @ 7.0 mph, 2 min @ 5.5 mph for 15 min)

Questions for You Readers!

  • What are you doing to move today?
  • Do you suffer from Allergies?  If So, what do you take?
  • Do you Like Weddings?

 

Food For Thought Monday:

Airports

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One of the happiest places in the world, in my opinion, is the arrival and baggage claim area of an airport. People with signs and flowers wait eagerly for their loved ones to come strolling through the doors from their flights, waiting for an embrace, a kiss, the moment when their person walks through.

There are families waiting for students coming home from college, friends waiting on long distance friends for a much anticipated visit, people traveling to a new location for the first time, wives (like me) waiting for their spouse to come home from a seemingly forever work trip, and then there are those stories who pull at your heart strings a little more.

I’m sitting across from a gorgeous woman with an American flag and a welcome home sign for her husband who is coming home from Iraq. She is dressed in a yellow sundress and her nerves are her only accessory.

“It’s been so long.” She says with a timid smile. “I can’t believe how long it’s been. Now it’s here.”

I smile and try not to become the emotional nut case that I am, but fail. She hands me a tissue and says that I look like she did everyday leading up to this. But that she is so sure that once he comes walking through the door, she’ll lose it.

Sure enough just moments later the gates open and another flood of people stream through the walk ways. Then, he appears.

She stands up holding her sign, and they make eye contact. Everyone else disappears but them. I watch silently wanting to take a picture of what I are next but can’t. It’s too personal, too beautiful. He takes her in his arms lifting her effortlessly and just says ‘Im home, baby. I’m home.”

I love airport baggage claim areas. I love the sight of two people reunited and nothing else mattering. I smile as I get a text message from the Husband saying he’s landed and I know that this means, momentarily, I’ll be having my own beautiful moment.

Have a great weekend.

Just a Little Bit of a Runny Egg

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  • I have fallen in love with my breakfast.  1/2  a baked sweet potato with 2 runny eggs on top.  It’s delish.  I would have taken  a picture, but I never leave time for that when they are done as they seem to apparate into my belly very quickly.
  • I tried a new protein powder this morning in my smoothie – 1 banana, 1 cup of frozen strawberries and almond milk with Optimal Nutrition Chocolate Flavored Whey.  I was told by some of the women on the NROLFW board on facebook that it was good and they all liked it, so I gave it a go.  Trutein and I have been friends, but I am kind of over their flavors, and their price.  I have a bit of stomach discomfort – which usually happens when I try a new protein powder, but it’s ok.  At least as long as it goes away after a few uses.
  • I’m double tracking on two calorie sites because I need the extra motivation.  I know that food/tracking is my downfall.  I have the workouts down.  I love to sweat and feel better when I do, so I tend to exercise as much as possible (about 6 days a week now).  This past week looked like:
    • Friday May 3 – NROLFW Stg 2 A3 & 2 Mile Run – 533 Calories
    • Saturday May 4 – 4 Mile Run – 592 Calories
    • Sunday May 5 – 3 Mile Run – 477 Calories
    • Monday May 6 – NROLFW Stg 2 B3 & 2 Miles of HIIT running – 431 Calories
    • Tuesday May 7 – 35 Minutes Running – 479 Calories
    • Wednesday May 8 – NROLFW Stg 2 A4 & 30 Minutes of HIIT Running & 1 mile incline walk – 552 Calories
    • Thursday May 9 – REST DAY
  • So in all I burned: 3064 Calories.  I most likely ate that much extra and more this week, but I am not weighing myself, so I won’t see that cursed number.  I know I’m pretty much maintaining my size right now, because nothing feels looser – in fact some clothes feel tighter.  But I am also sure I am bloated.  I still feel sick from my sugar binge yesterday.
  • Oh yeah I binged.  Wanna hear what I binged on?
    • 2 Homemade Chocolate Chip cookes
    • 2 fun size snickers bars
    • 3 fun size 3 Musketeers bars
    • 1 Apple Cinnamon Nutrigrain bar
    • 1 bag of M&Ms
  • I ate all of these in one sitting in a bathroom at work, while I cried.  Bipolar Disorder sucks y’all.  If you don’t have it you don’t understand.  That was self medicating so I didn’t go ape shit crazy and do something really dumb – like drive to Tampa because I miss my husband (the thought crossed my mind more than once this week).  But I called my “Bi-Polar Buddy” (a free counselor I found through an online network that I call when things get bad) and he talked me through it.  We both agreed that I need to go back to my doctor.  So I am making an appointment for next week.  We also agreed that I need more positive people in my life.  So anyone want to move in with me and be my bright ray of sunshine?  Seriously.  You can’t have any problems that you expect me to deal with, because I can’t deal with my own. :-)
  • The binge continued with toast and peanut butter last night, but as I went to bed, feeling particularly gross and stuffed, I realized I didn’t want to do this anymore.  I am not ‘starting over’ I am simply moving on.  Clean eating and water like it’s my job from now on.  I don’t even want cheese.  I just want ice on a stick.
  • The Husband Comes Home Tomorrow!  I have laundry and some light cleaning to do that I will get to tomorrow after my Praxis II exam, and then hopefully have enough time to just relax before Dinner with a Friend.  I am planning on waking up at 5:30 tomorrow and getting my workout done, so I can work from home in the morning and then head to my exam without having anything else on my mind.  Plus the workout is just NROLFW and HIIT so I should finish it in like 40 minutes.

What workout are you doing today?  Or is it a rest day?

Sweet or Salty Snacks?

Are you happy it’s almost Friday?

Food For Thought Thursday:

Tuesday Things

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Me, at every finish line.

Me, at every finish line.

Yup.

  • I’m in a better head space than I was yesterday during my whiny annoying banter.  I am looking at things differently today, because I have no choice but to.  The negativity can consume you, sure, but then whats the point?  Why am I working so hard in my workouts to simply feel like crap the other 23 hours of the day? I am choosing to carry over those feelings from when I finish my strength training or a hard run – those feelings of satisfaction, gratefulness, pride – and letting them rule for the other 23 hours.  Or at least the hours I am awake.
  • Since the Husband is on travel, I have been going to bed earlier, and I have to say, I like it.  I will be making him follow suit upon his return.
  • Candy Crush on Facebook is pure evil.  PURE EVIL. I’m addicted.
  • I am pretty sure I am going to bomb the Praxis II test on Friday.  I feel not ready, and feel like I should be taking the entire week off to study.  Or I should reschedule.
  • I’ve learned that when talking to someone who is obviously not really interested in what you have to say, the best way to captivate them is to mention something they care about, and periodically respond with ‘Oh, yeah?’ and ‘Cool!’  Works like a charm.
  • Did you hear about these two women who have been missing for 10 years, and they were found alive??  Brings chills.
  • Gov. Christie of New Jersey has opened up that he has had Lap Band Surgery.  I applaud him for being open about it, and for being strong enough to take steps in the right direction towards his health, regardless of how he gets there.  Through Doctor Monitoring I am sure he will succeed at his goals.
  • YEAH THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT NORTH KOREA
  • Tweets I like:

 

 

  • I’m running today – 40 minutes of intervals ( 4 min @ 6.3 / 1 min @ 4.0)  We’ll see how this goes.  I miss being outside but with Rain/Allergies/Looming Cicada infestation I am afraid to be outside for fear of turning into the human version of a sneeze.  Or a puddle.  Or being eaten alive.  Like what if there was a radioactive cicada, and it bit me, and I became Cicada girl?  I’d be blind, and my sole purpose would be to mate and then die.  Great powers.

Food For Thought Tuesday:

 

Oh Monday…

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I am having a fat day.  I feel bloated, and heavy, and restricted in my clothes.

I’m chugging water and eating on plan and tracking everything.  EVERYTHING.  Honestly.

I’m questioning my Paleo-ness at this point.  I mean I could commit to 30 days of Paleo again and see where it takes me in Month 2, but I am seriously questioning the point.  I mean I kind of moved my eating habits away from grains anyways – excluding the cheat meal of the week – and pretty much everything else is the same.

So now it comes down to portions.

Now it comes down to actually thinking through if I am hungry or just mentally craving something because of some addictive property in that food (Sugar, Caffeine, etc.).  This is where the mind change gets in.  This week – Starting today – I am simply tracking everything I eat – good or bad – and all the exercise I do (always good) and then reflecting on how I felt at the end of each day.

I am, for the time being, going by the Caloric Intake that MyFitnessPal.com generated for me, and will be doing that for the next week, to see how I do.  I will still be exercising like always, and eating back those calories.

I need to decipher mental vs. physical hunger, and that has to come first.


I put the Husband on a plane last night for his work trip, and it shockingly wasn’t hard to fall asleep, it was hard to not have anyone to speak to last night though.  I mean Blarney and Moody are great and all, but they can’t respond back in a language I understand.

Not Good For Conversation

Not Good For Conversation

I am having a very blah day, and it’s not helping that with that blahness, I am looking out the window to blah weather.  BLAH.

Workout:

  • NROLFW Stg 2 B3 & intervals (I’m kicking this up a notch today and going for 21 minutes at HIIT – 1 Min all out effort 2 min recovery for 7 rounds)

I’m not going to post my menu today, because since I started writing this post I veered off track (still track on MFP) so badly. UGH Monday.

I hope you all are having a better day than I.

Food For Thought Monday

Face It Friday – Paleo Week 5

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I’m really falling into the rut of “Is this working?”  I’m sure it is, deep down, and my surface has just yet to catch up.  Kind of like my acne medication.  I am sure it’s working but I have yet to reap the full benefits.

Speaking of Crazy, So I am now obsessed with Facebook games:  Farm Heroes, Candy Crush, and Pet Rescue.  Send help.  I am literally playing them whenever I can.

Candy Crush. Currently Locked Out because I lost too many times.

Candy Crush. Currently Locked Out because I lost too many times.

Luckily I have to take breaks, like when I lose too much and am locked out, or like when I have to study, workout, or do my job.

This weekend is pretty laid back with not much planned.  Tonight is dinner out with Lisa to congratulate her for finalizing her move to Sweden in July!  Tomorrow is most like a run in the morning while the Husband mows the lawn, and then who knows – Mother’s Day Shopping?  I’m done with my mom, but I am sure he needs to do some more shopping for her.

Might even stop at some used equipment places looking for a Barbell.  Who knows!

Sunday is my nephews 6 Birthday.  HOLY CRAP WHEN DID HE GROW UP?  That means the Husband and I will have been married for 6 years this June.  HOLY CRAP.  How have we not killed each other yet?

Then I am putting my husband on a plane and sending him to Floirda for work.  Lucky Duck.  I know he’ll be busy the entire time, but still, the idea of going anywhere at this point, even for work, sounds better than just being here.

Next week is my last week of the Spring Semester, and I am expecting A’s in both classes.  I BETTER GET THEM.  I’m about half way through one of the books for one of my summer classes, and even though it’s young adult, I really like it.

Sherman Alexie

The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie is about a kid who grows up on a reservation with his alcoholic parents, his older sister, and his one friend who comes from an abusive home.  His family is dirt poor, but with the motivation and encouragement from a teacher, he leaves the “Rez” for his schooling at a racist and white high school about 22 miles away.  So far I am really enjoying it, and I’m already brainstorming ways to teach this book if it is offered to me.

I also found out that Fairfax uses “The Fault in Our Stars” as summer reading for their 9th grade class.  HOW AWESOME IS THAT?

I had a bit of a meltdown last night that carried into this morning.  I am trying desperately to be positive, about everything, but alas my mental issues are catching up with me.  Since being diagnosed with first Depression, and then Bipolar Disorder a while back I have been on and off medication probably since I was 13.  While this is never what anyone should do with a diagnosed mental illness, it was my choice to go off medication because I couldn’t feel on it.  It wasn’t like I wasn’t myself, I just wasn’t anyone.  Since then I have tried many different forms of medication, but I haven’t been seeing a therapist or a licensed Psychiatrist, so my medication decisions have come from my primary care physician, which would be fine, but she is simply “trying things” out instead of looking at the root problems – which is fine, because that’s not her job to be my therapist.

So I am going to do some research and look into finding a doctor who can help, and get me back on track.  I think that could be a big reason why nothing in my head seems to fit together right and I can’t seem to find joy in much these days.

Wow that was deep.  And Heavy.. Sorry for that on a Friday!

So Today’s Plan:

  • Breakfast: 2 Eggs, 1/2 sweet potato, 2 sausage links, coffee, smoothie
  • Lunch: Chipotle Power Salad – lettuce, Chicken, veggies, Milk/Med salsa, Guacamole
  • Snack: Banana, apple, or almonds
  • Dinner: Big Bowl – Chicken Stirfry with Ginger Soy sauce (no rice) 1 Beer
  • Snack: Gelato (may be)

Activity: NROLFW Stage 2 A3 & 2-3 Miles on the treadmill

 

Food For Thought Friday:

Thursday Things

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  • Have you heard of DOMS? It stands for Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness (or something…) and I am in this stage in full effect.  Walking hurts, laying down hurts, sleeping I’m sure hurts, if I was able to know, Sitting hurts.  Eating hurts.  Everything hurts.  Today is a rest day.  It was going to be a rest day anyways, but now it is most certainly a rest day.
  • My breakfast of 1/2 a sweet potato and 2 runny eggs is officially the best meal ever.  I am pretty sure next week when I am cooking for one I’ll be eating this for dinner as well. Oh I am excited.  Not about being alone and left to my own devices, like remembering to wake up on time, and feeding the dogs, but that I can experiment with food a bit more freely.  If something I make now sucks and is horrible, I can’t throw it out and serve popcorn, the Husband won’t have that.  But next week, I can.
  • I am really trying not to be discouraged at this point.  It’s really hard not to be.  I’m going against everything I’ve ever learned about “dieting” or “losing weight” and it’s scary.  I mean on a given day I am still at a deficit in calories, and I am not hungry, so I am not thinking it’s that horrible, right?  My body will catch up eventually.  I am just ready to not feel trapped by the uncomfortable feeling that is living inside this body.
  • I got my hair cut yesterday:

Post Cut / Post Workout

  • It’s not drastic. I mean it’s shorter than it was, but there are more layers, and it feels less heavy and less dead.  My ends were horrible.  My hair is still damaged from doing the brazillian straightening system last summer, so it’s still getting better. Baby steps.  As with everything in life.
  • I have realized with this post I am very boring.
  • THIS makes me so happy.  Live in Northern VA?  Let’s help out a little girl with cancer!
  • I want this entire outfit, hair color, everything:

  • I think it’s really unfair that the mint jeans trend would catch on and was not disclosed to me by my fashion bloggers that I follow religiously, when I found the best pair of mint green jeans in January, but didn’t buy them, because I thought “Oh this will never catch on”.  NOW THEY ARE EVERYWHERE.  If I buy a pair now, I will just look like a fashion trend lemming.  I just didn’t want to be the weirdo in mint green jeans.  From now on, I will buy what I want and what I like, and if it’s trendy, I started it.  
  • This is like my anthem for this summer.  I love Ellie Goulding – ever since I heard ‘Lights’ like 2.5 years ago, and then she performed at Kate and Wills Wedding – COVERING THE HUSBANDS AND MY WEDDING SONG – and now this song is like all I can listen to.  It’s my song.  Mine.  She wrote it for me.
  • Cannibalism Evidence Found in Jamestown –  Well then founding fathers… You have some explaining to do.  My husband’s college friend’s sister was actually part of this press release, so a few degrees of separation between me and being involved in a CNN article.

Articles of Interest:

Wednesday Possibilities – National Runner Month #RunHappyIs @BrooksRunning

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#RunHappy

#RunHappy

Have you experienced this?  I didn’t think it was true, but man, after my Half Marathon (March 2012), I had one beer, and was like blitzed.  I couldn’t believe it.  I was like “But, it was just one?  and I ate stuff.”  My body was experiencing alcohol for the first time it seemed.  I felt like and after school special actress showing children why drinking is bad, and you should just enjoy running.

#RunHappy

#RunHappy

I was always an outcast or a loser in high school, and pretty much through college.  I didn’t get beat up, because I am female, but I had fair weather friends through out both phases in my life, and never quite felt like I belonged to any group, or anyone.  It wasn’t until I laced up running shoes and started running that I found my family.  I am welcomed and encouraged at each event, and even have been told that I inspired people post race.  This one woman at this years Rock n’ Roll Half Marathon told me my race shirt got her through the last mile.  She was going to walk it, until she saw me pass her.

(on the back of the shirt it says “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” – it’s from Team 413)

I never felt like I could be part of a community like this, that is so large.  A smile and a wave to other runners while I am in my neighborhood.  A high five to the girls from the summer Lemonade stand that saved me that one year when I ran out of water.  The woman at the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer 5K who is holding a sign that simply says “Thank You.”

I feel sorry for people who don’t have a family as large as mine, but I’d be more than happy to welcome them if they care to join.

#Runhappy

#Runhappy

PACE BE DAMNED.  I am not planning on winning any races.  I am not even planning on qualifying for races that need qualifying times.  I am only planning on finishing, and finishing with a smile on my face.  I don’t care if you can run 4’58″ minute miles.  THAT’S AWESOME FOR YOU.  Go to the Olympics and make your mom, country, coach proud.  For me, it’s about the moments where it’s me and the road.  I have my music, but that fades into the background and I can just beat peace as my feet hit the ground.  Yeah people pass me.  Old people pass me.  Pregnant women pass me.  Children pass me.  That guy in DC with one leg who does the half marathon every year, PASSED ME.  I don’t care.  I’m good where I’m at.

**Side bar… Just because I am okay with my pace doesn’t mean I enjoy being called a Penguin – a term commonly used by snooty runners in reference to slower runners – it takes a lot more guts to register and run a race with a slower pace knowing you will have to walk, than it does when you are elite and run like it’s your job.  Be kind to all paced runners.  We all have feelings.**

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It’s National Runner Month and Brooks has this handy little hashtag called #RunHappyIs and you can fill in your own statement and personalize it for your own blog, twitter, whatever, as your run happy mantra!

Go to http://is.runhappy.com and personalize your own!

** I am not affiliated with Brooks Running in any way other than I use their products, love their Ghost 5′s in Pink and would be grateful to be an ambassador for them some day (hint hint) **

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Today’s Plan:

  • Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1/2 sweet potato, Coffee, smoothie
  • Snack: LaraBar
  • Lunch: Quinoa, Ground Turkey & Tomato Sauce, Apple with almond butter, carrots
  • Snack: Almonds
  • Dinner: Chicken Stir Fry with Asian Slaw
  • Activity: NROLFW Stg 2 B2 (intervals included in workout)

I have an appointment this afternoon, so I get to leave work early and then I’ll be home to workout.  I woke up at 5:00am to workout but couldn’t drag myself out of bed, so I stayed there for another hour, contemplating my failure to rise early.  I figure once I am between a rock and hard place with my workouts this summer, I’ll get up easier, but for now, with the option of afternoon workouts, I am pretty set in my ways of sleeping till I have to get up to get ready for work.

I need motivation.  I am lacking in the morning motivation department.

Day 1/31 – No Weighing In and No Buying Stuff for myself